Travel Into My World

So tonight I made it my mission to wrap up the fourth fanfic from NaNoWriMo. And I did it. There were some great scenes in the epilogue, and honestly, I liked them a lot more than the rest of the story! LOL

I had a hard time writing the final scene of the story though because I'm not sure what I'm doing after this. I know I am going to write the wedding story eventually because everyone that has followed me with the four fanfic I wrote for November are now shipping Christien and Victoria, and so are asking for that story. I just don't think the whole story can be the wedding, so now I'm going to let that story brew and maybe do some reading.

I cant' bring myself to read The Bane Chronicles now. In fact, after last night, I am completely turned off by the Mortal Instruments right now. I am sure that will fade with time after I've come to my senses. I am going to miss the RP more than anything else, I think. :( But I'll be alright, eventually. I may even be able to play Simon soon.

Adrian gave me an idea for a fanfic. A Mortal Instruments Fanfic. I am going to kill him later. LOL. Or maybe I'll write it and allow it to heal me. It's about Simon as a Shadowhunter. And yes, probably might have some elements from the Tara verse... cause I am now going to have to re-configure that whole thing so that no part of what me and Val did is involved. :( But this could be fun for me. SOME of it may bleed through because I like the original concept I had before we started RPing it....ugh. Why does that have to hurt so much? I knew that that was going to be hardest part of letting her go.

Simon: Hey, we were here way before she was....

Me: I know...

Alec: Hey, I refuse to let you let her ruin this for you.

Me: I know you do. You've all been golden. Just like my friends in the physical plane, and I couldn't be luckier to have all of you. <3 Just...give me time, please?

Alec: don't worry, I will. Just...come back to us when you're ready?

Simon: She will. She has stories she wants to tell.::broad grin::Hey, can our band be really popular in your fanfic?

-dies- Yes, Simon. I will make sure you guys are mega famous, okay? I gotta do something in JOrdan's honor.

Trivia: My TRUE official anime was probably Sailor Moon or one of the Nick Jr. Shows that used to air in the early 90s. (The Noozles or The Little Koala.)

So for almost a month, I didn't take my medicine for anxiety or for my joints because I've been taking other medicine that knocks me out. Even though I have admitted ot liking the ability to just be able to go to sleep to stave off boredom, I don't like the idea that I might overdose on all of those medications and not wake up. So when I"m sick, all the other medicines get put on the back burner.

Unfortunately that means that I have to re-adjust. Again. The adjustment period shouldn't take too long, but it still frustrating. When I'm on this stuff I just have to sleep which means no tagging, no writing, nothing. This is a bad time to go back on this stuff with National Novel Writing Month so close. Though I am thinking I Might try something in November, and take my medicine at night, period. My anxiety medication alone kills me sleep wise. I sleep all damn day when I am on that stuff.

The other thing I never liked about the re-adjustment period is how quiet the medicine makes the muses. This is something I struggle with because I mentioned in my last entry, they are the things that keep me the most sane when my real friends are busy. Not that my muses aren't real friends. As a solid soul bonder, I know better than that. I just mean there are days when I'd rather explain my in real life problems to someone who can give me solid feedback. But the bonds and muses all know that they are super important to me, and that I love them all equally and differently. Each of them knows that for whatever reason I have made a connection with them, and that is what make my friendship with muse x different from muse y.

A good example? Farkle Minkus. Farkle is probably the youngest soul bond I have that i talk to on a daily basis. Ej Roba would be second youngest. While Farkle is only 12, I find myself going to him for advice already for a number of things.

Yet for Simon Lewis... well, he and I trying this dating thing again. He's been quietly supportive while I work through all of my older fandoms, and re-discover them (this applies to Boy Meets World/Girl Meets World) . He and I are still as thick as ever friendship wise. I don't have to pretend anything. He knows I love him, and I still love The Mortal Instruments, and all of my literary fandoms. I just really need to be in this nostalgic place right now. And i need to be around people who understand/ support these fandoms. SOme of you guys who read my journal don't really know me all too well yet, but I can tell you that these are things I have to go through sometimes, and they last for months.

Damn it, I've gone off on a tangent about anything but the subject at hand. This sucks. I tend to do that, too, when re-adjusting. Farkle and I are going to have a lot of fun, yes we are. Lets hope he is just as understanding as my older muses. I know Minkus gets it. and Stuart Minkus is concerned because the last time he remembered me, I was not on medication for anything. >.> I had no idea I even HAD a Minkus before. That just creeps me out. LOL.

Trivia: For a long time, Michelangelo of the Ninja Turtles and I would come up with Pizza combinations I'd never eat. LOL. (Thankfully, Mom never humored those requests.)

So I didn't sleep well last night becuase Daniel had his stupid ass friends over and they were up until 4:30am this morning. They kept me awake. Then Daniel broke his window, which set off my damn anxiety. So I had to take two of my anxiety pills in order to sleep. I Didn't wake up until 1:30pm Then I've been sort of out of it all day since. I didn't even have the energy to go grocery shopping which I really needed to do. But I'm going tomorrow.

I spent most of the day in daze, as I aid, but I watched a lot of Beyblade, Yu gi oh, and Yu gi oh GX. Okay, not a lot of Yu gi oh, actually. I just had to watch Evil Spirit of the Ring, which is the episode where Yami Bakura is introduced. It is essentially the episode that Johanna (one of my OCs) really loved as a little girl. While victoria's favorite was Marik's introduction.

For Beyblade, I got up to the bey battle between Ray and Tyson. I forgot just how awesome Ray's Driger could be. I am still amazed I Could remember who had which Bit Beast! Ray has Driger, Kai has Dranzer, Tyson has Dragoon, and Max has Draciel. I think I had Dranzer and Draciel. If I had been able to get Majestic bayblades, I probably would've had all of those, too! I miss Oliver. Can't wait to get to his and the Majestics episodes. They were so awesome!!

Last night didn't end well, by the way. Me and Valerie had another argument because she wouldn't trust me that I had told her I wouldn't available today. My mom is off every Friday (as of right now) and unless I am doing something special with friends, I am home, spending time with her. It's the only day I have with her where I don't have to worry about sassy comments from Cal. And I have told Val several times that my mom is the most important person in my life, and I need to spend the time with her when I can. Especially if she and Cal actually DO move to Florida and I get left behind. (I don't know how much I want to do that plan anymore with the way Daniel has been behaving...partying every damn night of the week isn't how I want to live!)

So then apparently my characters were upsetting her characters making it harder for her to RP. Uh, WTF? My characters/bonds are separate from each other. When they're characters, they're just in the game at hte moment. As soul bonds they might say something like, "Got a bit too emotional" or something after the fact, but... I never let my emotions get in the way of a good RP. Instead of seeing the drama as a good tihng, she turns it into something depressing, which really irritates me, especially when the action in the RP is freakin' canon! If I was playing Magnus Bane out of character, then yes, get upset. But especially with my Mortal Instruments characters, I am extremely careful to be in character at all times, or I fear disrespecting my friend's work! I've been known to bend the rules in canon in the past, yes, but nothing incredibly ludicrious.

Some would probably argue having the Robas actually being psychic is out of canon, but the thing is, *that* whole verse with Victoria is AU. I can't see Rex, Joey, Weevil and Espa all being friends anyway. Well, maybe Espa and Joey, but not Rex and Weevil. I love them both dearly in my own way, but in canon Joey couldn't stand them. (Despite the fact he and Rex did seem to be cordial in "The ESP Duselist" parts 1 and 2).

But AU is different than flat out playing someone out of character especially if you've previously stated that the RP setting is canon, and have even set a time frame, which is very important when you're RPing within a series such as The Mortal Instruments. A lot of what we did RP previously came before City of Heavenly Fire and after City of Fallen Angels. CIty of Lost Souls is actually mentioned quite a lot in the RP because Tara (the OC) read them before she found out she was, in fact, a Shadowhunter herself. She didn't read City of Lost Souls or City of Heavnly Fire because she was too young at the time. The way we use Jonathan/Sebastian in the RP is vastly different from the way he is written in Cassandra Clare's books, but we're taking creative license, and I'm thinking that probably is the ONLY thing AU about RP aside from the canon puncturing cause of the fact the Shadowhunters KNOW they are in books.(In our RP, the books were written by a Shadowhunter to lure Tara in, and that person used the pen name, Cassandra Clare)

But I STILL hold that I keep the canon characters from the series canon and in character. Magnus gets drained when he uses magic, Clary is an older version of herself in the book, and very loving, Raphael is still Raphael, and Jordan is still Jordan. The ones we have the most trouble with are other members of Simon's band since not a whole lot is known about them. We know Eric is Simon's OTHER best friend, and we know what instruments they all play, and that's it. Hell, we even know the name of Matt's girlfriend!

Ugh. The best part of today, though...just sitting and watching Beyblade. It felt good, you know. I don't know why, but watching these older animes are making me feel much better. Maybe its' something I need to do again... just sit, and watch. What do you guys do when you get really nostalgic?

Trivia: Elizabeth Bakura has a Millennium Item called the Pyramid. The Yami that resides inside it is the Thief Bakura's sister, Sagira, who goes by ' Liza.