Travel Into My World

So as you may know, for a few weeks now I have been dealing with a lot of pain in my left elbow that was starting to effect everything I did from typing to cooking dinner. I can now say that I've found something that helps! Today I was out shopping with Mom and she bought me a copper fit compression sleeve for my elbow. This thing has helped from the moment I put it on! I am so happy because this means I can be on the PC and write again. I'm still not going to chance being online a lot and typing in multiple applications at a time. This means I will be relying on my phone for messaging and Plurk. <3

While I was out today, I bought myself a badly needed new Tumbler and some Squishy sand. This is a brand of kinetic sand. I bought it in hopes of finding another outlet for my anxiety in the event I can't get on the PC to write. This stuff is exactly as advertised. It doesn't stick to anything. And it's not sticky or oily (like play doh or sculpy clay). I am planning to use it for Zen therapy. To maybe help my creativity, and relax nerves.

I am on a count down now, too. This countdown is for Big Hero 6. I get my copy on Bluray on Tuesday! I can't wait. I'm super excited to have Baymax in my hands. I have tried to watch it using other means, but it has all failed. I guess that's what I get for trying to do something not quite legal.

Last night I worte close to 1k words on my dystopian. I love how this is coming out, and I am excited. Journey is about to tell Atlas his full plans for bringing down the Dictator. It's going to be awesome! I can't wait to see what these guys have planned for me tonight after Backstrom. (Yes, I am watching a new Fox show, and hoping it doesn't get cancelled. It's by producer Hart Hanson who does Bones, and did the Finder. So far only Bones has been successful.) Anyway, that's what I'm hoping to happen tonight.

But for now, I am going to get caught up on my Mobile games and then rest. Going out really racked on my nerves today, and I'm not used to that. It was Wal-Mart for crying out loud. Who gets anxious at a Wal-Mart?! If this keeps up, I may have problems when it comes to going back to Barnes and Noble on a regular basis in the Spring. Here's hoping...

Okay, so Fall is definitely here, and my system is not happy. It started yesterday while I was at Barnes and Noble. By the time Mom picked me up at the store, I had no voice. When I went to bed, I was stuffy and my head throbbed. It's throbbing now.

I got up around 5am because I couldn't breathe and tried to find some last antibiotics from other illnesses. I know you really shouldn't do that, but I was desperate for some relief. I went back to sleep on the couch and had weird, lucid dreams. I was dumb founded. My brain must just be on overdrive period. My friend Adrian and I were suspecting it was the cocktail of medication I'm on. I don't think I've really talked much about the medication I take, so I guess I'll do that now.

I on 5 different medications. I'm on Baclofen for muscle tightness. That's 10mg twice a day. I'm on Remeron for anxiety disorder. That's 15mg supposedly 2 a day, but I only take one. Prilosec prescription strength. That's 40mg. Gabaapentin 100m twice a day. I am also on a sleep aid called Restoril, 30mg. I've been trying not to take it every night, but lately it's been super hard.

The only problem I have with these medications, and the MOST important thing about these medicines other than that they actually work, is that they knock me out for hours at a time after I take them. And since at least 3 of these are supposed to be twice a day, you can see the frustration.

Why do I bring them up? Well, mostly because my parents don't seem to understand why I spend so much time sleeping. I guess it's probably boredom too. But mostly it's the medicine. If I don't lay down when I can, I feel like I'm high as a kite. Then I just can't FOCUS. So it's terrible. It's darned if I do, darned if I don't. Sometimes I want to say shuck it all, and do what I have to do, and that's what I do.

The other side effect is, of course, the lucid dreams which is why they were also brought up. Adrian and I believe that the medication has side effects of lucid dreams, or the realistic ones. I've had instances of yelling at people who have said nothing aloud. I've had realistic dreams about Simon Lewis, and I even had one about Harry Potter and the Hogwarts community. Of course all of my dreams are based on whatever I've done that day. If I've talked a lot about Simon, he shows up. If I've read a lot of Iron Trial, Callum Hunt and Aaron Stewart show up. If for some reason I've watched a lot of Teen Wolf, Scott shows up with Derek. Does that make sense? But the dreams themselves are quite disturbing because they are so realistic. I don't mind a good dream with my favorite characters in it, but when I can remember htem for days on end as if they were really here....yeah. I had one of those about Murphy, and it was SO SO upsetting when I woke up and had to remember he was gone. Seriously. The HELL. I shouldn't get upset. Maybe Murphy was just visiting? But I still miss him so much.

And with so many death anniversaries coming up.... you know. I just don't want anyone else showing up. If its that hard for a pet, I don't want to think about how hard it would be on me if humans who I have lost very recently started turning up. You know? So I could totally do without That particular side effect.

Trivia: I am notorious for developing muses and soul bonds with the best friend or secondary character. (Note: See the entry prior to this for more on that)