Meh

Feb. 4th, 2015 01:41 pm
faeriewings1781: (Default)
The last few days have been amazing in some ways. I've been playing with my tablet (mostly playing Hay Day and Clash of Clans). It's a fun way to spend my days because to be perfectly honest, being on the laptop is too much pain for me right now. I probably should consider checking into a release surgery or something, but I know that when I'm not using the laptop to type, I can actually find relief, and also, once the cold weather has passed, it won't be nearly as bad.

On the other hand, I'm being driven nuts because I just really want to write, and even though I can do it on my tablet, I can't save it to my flash drive. I could use Dropbox, yeah, but eh. The accuracy isn't really... good.

I'm also frustrated by the fact that I had to drop 40.00 on a new phone. That was completely unexpected. I mean, I had given Mom 300.00 for the new tablet plus the accessories (the case and stylus), and I had to buy my train tickets for March. (Though Lexi is giving me that money back, so it wasn't really a loss.) It was just a *lot* of money in one day.

Then, I did the stupid thing of spending close to 30.00 something at Barnes and Noble on Sunday. The only reason I could do that was because I knew I was getting the train money back, but I still felt bad. Mom really thinks my impulsive spending has a lot to do with depression, and if you've read my last couple of entries, I really have been going through a lot of depression from having to be inside a lot cause of the cold, and this (the phone cost, and spending more than I initially thought I would on teablet accessories) has made it worse.

Do I regret the Barnes and Noble purchases? Not at all. I know I will read both of the books I bought, and I have already used the water bottle, and found it to be very effective for the purpose which I bought it. I just regret the amount of the actual purchases. I don't know if that really makes sense.... blah.

Anyway, that's what Mom and I've come to realize. She can always tell when I'm depressed. The impulse buys get worse when I'm really bad. And if I'm in a store where I *know* I will buy something.. well, forget inhibitions. They're done and gone. Heh.

But yeah, I've basically not been in the most social of moods, and I've been trying not to be around because I don't want people to feel down on my account, and I know a few people who are already dealing bad things. So I would rather not contribute to their stress. Just know that all of this will pass.

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